CT: Summer Movie Rundown
Oooo boy guys, I do not even know what happened last week. One minute it was Friday morning and I was considering what to write about and the next minute it was Sunday and Little C was saying "Didn't you have something you were supposed to do this weekend?" before we both realized in horror what had happened. I don't know what to say except it's summertime in a real way around these parts. If we had an XBox I guarantee we wouldn't even be talking right now. Which is why we for reals do not have an XBox. Like that is the exact reason.
But I digress.
In the last two months Little C and I have seen approximately 17,000 movies. The summer action movies hit us in full force this year, y'all, and we've been doing our best to keep up. But there's simply no way to review everything all the time. We have the opinions, for sure, but we don't have the brain space or the minutes in the day to get to all of them.
So, to make up for missing last week, this post is going to be a monster rundown of our general thoughts on all the movies we've seen (and a couple we didn't). No in-depth explainers here. Just my raw, emotional opinions. Got it? Let's do this thing:
Guardians of the Galaxy: Vol. 2
So much fun, but if only we had spent more time building a super fun world with that team and less time on Bing Bong Ding Dong and his dad issues. But hey, Kurt Russell! And 10/10 for the gold planet. We'd visit there for sure.
King Arthur: Legend of the Sword
People kept saying that this wasn't any good, but to be honest if you heard that Guy Ritchie was directing a movie about King Arthur this is EXACTLY what you should have been expecting. No, it wasn't a serious period piece but I would have been deeply disappointed if it had been. No, it wasn't perfect but we had a great time with this one. 15/10 for Charlie Hunnam shadowboxing.
Pirates of the Caribbean 15: Johnny Depp's Mustache
Didn't see it because... sometimes it's time to let something go. Like maybe 2 or 3 or 4 movies ago. 1/10 for Johnny Depp and his earpiece
Wonder Woman
Saw this like 5 times in place of seeing Pirates of the Caribbean. Holy Goodness, I'm not even really ready to talk about this movie yet. It was amazing. The ice cream. No Man's Land. The baby. David Thewlis' mustache. NO MAN'S LAND. I want six seasons and a movie about Themyscira and the Amazons.
No but in as much seriousness as we ever muster, this was a game changer. I cried like six times during the movie because it was so perfect. 20,000/10 for all of it
The Mummy
Didn't see it because we have a fierce loyalty to the Brendan Fraser version. Rick O'Connell or nothing, nerds. 1/10 for a lack of O'Connells
Baby Driver
There's no lack of love in our home for Edgar Wright. This movie is why I was so irritated about everyone saying LaLaLand was "technically perfect". No. This movie is what technical perfection in filmmaking looks like. The level of skill and vision that it takes to pull something like this movie off is incredible. Plus, that soundtrack. Wooooooweee... 8/10 (that third act had some issues)
Spider-Man: Homecoming
I was honestly super pleasantly surprised by how much I liked this movie. I've been telling everyone within shouting distance for months how sick I am of the Spider-Man story and how little interest I had in seeing this. But boy was this a good time. And he wasn't Donald Glover as Miles Morales, but Tom Holland was so, so charming. 8/10 for Zendaya, mostly
Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets
This was... pretty? Here's the thing- Luc Besson creates amazing worlds and beautiful visuals and incredible action sequences. The script was barely intelligible nonsense but the concepts were so cool that I was almost able to look past it. Maybe I'll buy it on DVD and watch it on silent? That might be the way we end up going with this. 10/10 for the Highlighter Planet, though.
Atomic Blonde
I am famously uninterested in Cold War movies to the deep shame of my film-y friends and family. And again, honesty time, I don't think I knew it was a Cold War movie until I was walking into the theater. But it was so good. It was 80% aesthetic and action sequences and 20% sorta shakey plot but whatever. The action sequences were on a whole different level from almost anything I'd ever seen before. We're actually seeing it again tonight because that stairwell fight scene is unbelievable and I have to see it again. 9/10 for those saturated neons
War for the Planet of the Apes
Should we be seeing these movies? We classified them as nonsense about four movies ago, but they just keep making them and people keep talking about them? Did we miss something?
Going to wait on talking about Dunkirk and The Dark Tower because we haven't gotten to either yet, and I'm guessing at least Dunkirk is going to need its own post.
Have a great weekend y'all!
CT
But I digress.
In the last two months Little C and I have seen approximately 17,000 movies. The summer action movies hit us in full force this year, y'all, and we've been doing our best to keep up. But there's simply no way to review everything all the time. We have the opinions, for sure, but we don't have the brain space or the minutes in the day to get to all of them.
So, to make up for missing last week, this post is going to be a monster rundown of our general thoughts on all the movies we've seen (and a couple we didn't). No in-depth explainers here. Just my raw, emotional opinions. Got it? Let's do this thing:
Guardians of the Galaxy: Vol. 2
So much fun, but if only we had spent more time building a super fun world with that team and less time on Bing Bong Ding Dong and his dad issues. But hey, Kurt Russell! And 10/10 for the gold planet. We'd visit there for sure.
King Arthur: Legend of the Sword
 |
| Image from IMDb |
Pirates of the Caribbean 15: Johnny Depp's Mustache
Didn't see it because... sometimes it's time to let something go. Like maybe 2 or 3 or 4 movies ago. 1/10 for Johnny Depp and his earpiece
Wonder Woman
 |
| Image from IMDb |
No but in as much seriousness as we ever muster, this was a game changer. I cried like six times during the movie because it was so perfect. 20,000/10 for all of it
The Mummy
Didn't see it because we have a fierce loyalty to the Brendan Fraser version. Rick O'Connell or nothing, nerds. 1/10 for a lack of O'Connells
Baby Driver
 |
| Image from IMDb |
Spider-Man: Homecoming
I was honestly super pleasantly surprised by how much I liked this movie. I've been telling everyone within shouting distance for months how sick I am of the Spider-Man story and how little interest I had in seeing this. But boy was this a good time. And he wasn't Donald Glover as Miles Morales, but Tom Holland was so, so charming. 8/10 for Zendaya, mostly
Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets
 |
| Image from IMDb |
Atomic Blonde
 |
| Image from IMDb |
War for the Planet of the Apes
Should we be seeing these movies? We classified them as nonsense about four movies ago, but they just keep making them and people keep talking about them? Did we miss something?
Going to wait on talking about Dunkirk and The Dark Tower because we haven't gotten to either yet, and I'm guessing at least Dunkirk is going to need its own post.
Have a great weekend y'all!
CT
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